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Writings of Becky

July Poetry 2007 Part 1

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beckyms1213
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July Poetry 2007 Part 1

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July Poetry
Becky M.S.
© 2007
 
7/3/2007
 
 
Empty Skeptic
 
Like bottle with no beer
I feel empty inside
Like a skeptic
With nothing to hide
 
Nothing feels right anymore
Did he ever care?
I just need to know the truth
So I can more from here.
 
Argue
 
I argue
With myself
With a piece of me
Begging for
One moment
Of collective peace
All I can do is scream
 
Frustrations
Are calling
My names
Friends
(That’s what they call my selves)
My calling my name
In a fake voice
Of the purest deception
That I thought
At one point in my life
I truly knew myself.
All was false
 
Time is hill
Time is a space
Time is a drain
Allowing life
To fall in
A spiraling motion . . .
 
I just want it
To stop
Let me find
My own career
A car and a place
In an exciting city
May all of our
Dreams come true. . .
 
Then I woke up to realize. . .
The dreams will come true
For everyone else
But me.
 
Worship
 
Note after note
Bring a love
As it engulfs
Bringing one to its
Goosebumps
And emotional ways
 
It also brings
Hate
No charge
Fights within one’s soul
Don’t cry
Don’t weep
Don’t express these feelings now
 
Worship
Pulls in souls
Even with fighting
The frustrations,
And annoyances
 
Everything just stops
STOPS!
Stop playing
Just bring silence
Crush the holy embrace
I don’t want to be hug by cloud
Right now
 
Except in the silence
They began to pray
ERRRRR!
I don’t wan to this anymore
I don’t want to fight. . .
I just want it to stop.
I’m on strike!
 
Grey Blood
 
Smoke
Smoky air
Chokes my lung
Stings through my veins
Allows me to
Constantly taste him
For that one second
I am with him again
While he’s with someone else
I have his smoky spirit
The grey blood of the past
That haunts me in my dreams
It reminds me if him
Every time I smell smoke
Especially when I taste the smoke. . .
I know he is with someone else
But for me
I am the fat bitchy nobody
Smoke alone
Wondering if he
Really loved me?
 
Smoky Sticks
 
A stick that falls lifeless
And dies
Just like me in away—
A worthless lie
 
I inhale
And I still cough
I do breathe in
Even if it turns me off
 
I am fucked
A useless joke
Inhale some more smoke
Hopefully I’ll choke
 
An illness I am
As cancer I’ll become
Full of hate and cum
I wish I was completely numb
Just to let everyone just run.
 
 
Letting Go (dedicated to an old flame. Adam)
 
I'll never forget you
And everything thing we had done
But no you're going on
I have to say Thank you, hun.
 
If I could
I would bring the world
But time as past
And you found another girl
 
I hope she is as sweet
And she is mind
I'm glad your hearts
Are lovely intertwined
 
You were my first love
And I just want you to know
I hope you'll always be happy
And now I have to let you go.
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